STC's Happy Hour Challenge 2: A Bard's Tale

Sunset Theatre Co. here--just under my regular account since I'm too lazy to switch back and forth to make one silly post

Here's the deal for my second challenge.

Your exploits have been heard far and wide--whether or not that's a good thing remains to be seen. A relatively obscure bard, looking to get a lute up in the world, decides to capitalize on the fact that nobody has sung about your escapades yet. He picks up his quill and parchment to hammer out a few verses in your honor.

Here's what you have to do: Write me a song (just the lyrics, of course) about your character and the things he or she has done.

Something like this if you need an example.

Spoony bards need not apply.

Two (2) fate points will be handed to the winner. This contest closes at midnight on January 13, 2009.

I'm not in the tournament (I'm a judge!) and my character for Althanas hasn't even been written past what you can read beneath my avatar to the left. I haven't even had a chance to read enough of Althanas history to write a bio, so pardon anything I may have gotten wrong. But here is something I came up with tonight, after listening to that awesome podcast.

(Also, if anyone decides to record it, I extend creative rights to you that you may do so! If you consider this a worthy piece, of course)

Without further ado,

A Drunk Man's Memories of Barland the Bard at the Spilled Ale Inn

Bartender
Send home the wenches!

Man 1
Close them shutters on your way out!

Man 2
Lock that damn door too!

Bard
For here's a tale I've scarcely told...
Tonight I'll sing to you!
So light up yer pipes-

Man 1
Fill up my mug, barkeep!

Bard
And shut yer traps and SIT,
But dare not fall asleep!
There've been some whispers,
Some of you be awares,
That this tale might even give
Grown men - nightmares!
The day had ended, all men slept,
The moon reflected eerie light,
But creatures stirred and with them,
Our hero, Underbright.

Man 1
Underbright? Elias Underbright, the dowser?
There ain't a heroic bone is his body!

Man 2
Oh shut you! He means his old man, Grisdon!

Bard
So Grisdon woke and found the world
In great alignment with his spell
He cast a magic upon the land
A dowser's magic, to create a well.
Shook well the ground for miles
And horses neighed three towns afar
As the damned abyss came forth -

Barkeep
And swallowed up me bar!
Bard, where exactly did this happen?
I haven't heard of no quakes ever,
These here parts, at least.

Bard
The question isn't where, but when!
Since then have passed near eighty feasts!
I heard this from my father,
He from a friend,
That old man Underbright had sold his soul
To avert that coldest end!
And not a man has seen him dead,
Though all recite his name,
The greatest dowser in the land
And yet a demon all the same!

Man 2
A demon? But you said he was a hero!
Lost in your own words?

Bard
No, no! So opened the abyss,
And fled from trees the birds,
A flame shot forth
From Grisdon's once campfire!
Who but the devil could be there,
To sell his bads to any buyer?
They say that there and then
Our Grisdon joined the damned,
And traded soul for such a magic
As never before graced this land!
But know you this:
Underbright did nothing such!
Instead, he struck a wager,
Intrigued the devil very much:
He would out-dowse that devil,
And in return he'd never die!
Or he'd give him his magic.
The devil aye'd! But devils lie!

Man 1
Damn right they do!
I'll drink to that!

Bard
Listen close, this next bit will
Shed light on Grisdon's brat.
Old Grisdon played the game,
And thought the rules were fair.
He pulled out his dowsing rods,
And dowsed about with care.
The devil used no such tools,
As he was well acquainted with
The ground from where he came.
But Griswold's skills aren't just myth:
He truly knew his trade,
And found that perfect place,
The one the devil chose,
On which his well to base.
But he're the clincher,
Listen well!
Or end up as the old man's soul,
Burning up in hell!
The devil'd schemed for this:
The rules said nothing of a tie!
So should he get that magic,
Or should Grisdon never die?
The devil, keeping to his word
Did both the deeds:
He gave the man eternal life
But took that, which mages bleed!

Man 1
Blood? Oh, oh, magic!

Man 2
I'll slap ye silly! Cut him off, 'tender!

Bartender
Darn right, and shut up you both!
I want ter hear the end'r!

Bard
Apologies, good barkeep:
The story's over, far as I can tell.
The abyss closed back up,
The devil jumped down that perfect well.
Grisdon had himself a son:
No magic in 'im, but may be biased,
As I think the story isn't done:
There may be hope yet, for Elias!
His dowsing is a wonder
And all his skills are those of you and me
Perhaps he'll find that devil,
And set his old man free!

Man 2
Hear hear! Another round, to go around!

Man 1
I'll drink to that!

I didn't put much into mine, so I don't expect to win. But I did record it.

The Ballad of Honuse Relaiyent

Born into obscurity
A troubled land
Fighting as a monster
At his lord’s command
Now he stands with glory
At the hand of Thor
Standing as a mountain
From the days of yore
Mighty in his stature
And strong of heart
Powerful in battle
As the morning’s start
Traveling alone
At his master’s call
Souls of the unworthy,
They begin to fall
Cower at his judgment
For his arm is grand
Honor for your loyalty
To his command
Slayer of giants
And of man and beast
Summoner of lightning
To a swift release
Honuse Relaiyent,
Lawmaker and lord
Honored of the gods
Master of the sword

Sorry for the delay.

Alias, its a shame that you can't use the fate points I'd totally award you for that awesome entry. You get the moral victory

But as it stands, the only other entrant, Shadowed... Well, seeing as you admitted that you didn't put much effort into your entry, but you did record it, I'll award you one (1) Fate Point for being such a good sport.

Thank you both for entering.

Y'know, I only just now realized that that 'bard's' tale is about dowsing against the devil. DOWSING. What sounds similar to dowsing? Maybe the drunk guy just heard the story wrong?

Also, I award myself (1) One Moral Victory Point, but I'm glad that Shadowed got a fate point :) I wasn't too sure about the lyrics when I read them, but they sounded quite good on the recording, so props!

Alright. Awkward moment time.

It has come to my attention that fate points are worth EXP.


So Alias, you're getting your two (2) fate points that you would've won anyways had you been participating in the tournament after all.

Thank you.

EDIT: Shadowed still gets his one (1).

http://orlyowl.tripod.com/sitebuilde...tures/orly.jpg
(Alright, but so long as Shaodwed still gets his (1) Fate Point. If not, I withdraw my entry (but you can still record it if you have the means!))

Saw the edit. Sweet. Someone is STILL welcome to record it :D